La Mia Vita

randomness.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

i have no patience lately for anything or anyone. the only down time i have just doesn't seem enough, and all i want to do is chill and not have to worry about anything. but i feel selfish and rude, and i'm not quite sure why i've been acting like this.

i've been wondering too much about what he's been up to...just thinking about him in general. i try not to, with work and school, etc, but at the end of the day i just get sad. i feel like i always have something going on in my social life to take my mind off things, but this time i don't. i need a project, something that will motivate me. work motivates me; but i need a personal project right now. something to help the inner me, and really help me grow and move on. i need to make a list of ideas.

i'm watching country music videos, but none i've seen before. i miss feeling like i live in texas. yeah, austin is really cool. i fit in here, and i love spending time here and everything there is to do. but i miss dallas and this feeling i can't describe...being here in austin really does seem like you're in an oasis in the middle of the state, because everything is so different. i keep wondering if i'll fall in love with this place and not want to leave. it makes me sad to think i might one day not want to go back to dallas. i guess i just don't want to let go.

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